Of highlights, low ponts and outrageous pun-ishment

Here’s Part II of my favorite TV moments in 35 years. It seems like yesterday that I was standing in front of a camera with no clue where to look or what to say. Wait, that was yesterday.

Most embarrassed I have ever been

In 1988, I had the rare opportunity to interview Cyd Charisse, a beautiful and leggy dance partner of Fred Astaire. My producer told me that Ms. Charisse was traveling the country and her tour was sponsored by Underalls — at least that’s what I thought she said. I knew Underalls was a brand of pantyhose, so this made perfect sense to me.

Ms. Charisse answered all my questions, but neglected to mention her sponsor. I decided to help her out.

“Well, Ms. Charisse, I’m sure that Underalls is very proud to have as their spokesperson a woman known for her beautiful legs.”

“I’m sure they would be, but my sponsor is Inderal, the drug I take for my crippling arthritis.”

One of my favorite moments

I was interviewing a panel of young men who, as the result of motorcycle accidents, had endured a traumatic head injury. One of the panelists, Jay, had short-term memory loss. To compensate for this, he jotted down notes throughout the interview on a mini yellow legal pad so he could keep track of the questions and answers.

Sitting next to Jay was another patient named John. Throughout the show I confused their names, often addressing Jay as John and vice versa. After making this mistake for the fourth time, Jay broke out in a big grin and said:

“Dick, would you like to borrow my pad?”

Funniest thing my wife ever said after a show

Almost 35 years ago, I did a segment in Columbus, Ohio, about couples who swing. This wasn’t dancing. These were married folks who switched partners. When I got home, my wife told me how impressed she was with the guests.

“You were impressed?” I asked, jaw dropping.

“Yes. We can’t even find a couple to go to the movies with.”

My biggest thrill

In 1982 I interviewed my idol, Steve Allen. He was talking about the great comics of the silent era: “Chaplin was my favorite, but where do you find people of that ilk any more?” Allen asked rhetorically.

“You could join the Ilk’s Club,” I suggested, realizing this was a totally rotten pun, but one that Allen might have made himself.

Steve Allen cackled, as only Steve Allen could. I had made my hero laugh, and I hadn’t even started a bucket list yet.

My best pun

In the late ’70s, I was hosting “Good Morning, New York.” I had the opportunity to interview boxing champion Sugar Ray Leonard. Because he was doing 7-Up commercials at the time, I asked him if he would mind autographing a 2-liter bottle I picked up on the way to the studio.

“But, Dick,” he said, “this is a regular 7-Up bottle. I just do the Diet 7-Up commercials.”

“OK, then, could you sign it ‘Sugar-Free Ray Leonard’?”