Fall time: Bagging Halloween candy, Thanksgiving turkey

I am not one to bring on the fear-mongering, but after the super-moon lunar eclipse last Sunday evening, I just realized that as of today we have exactly 28 days until Halloween, 54 days until Thanksgiving and 83 days until Christmas.

So if you’re one of those especially talented parents who sew those stunning Halloween costumes, you had better get on it. I acknowledge I lack for talent in this area.

But if I had the chance to do it all over again, I admit I’d still go the easy route and buy three pair of blue jean overalls at Rural King — (and get free popcorn while I’m there) — to put over matching bright yellow hooded, pull-over sweatshirts. Then I’d slap gray shiny swim goggles over their eyes, pull up their yellow hoods over their heads and send them out with 10 of their same-dressed cousins or friends and tell the little “minions” to have fun.

Of course I would dress up as Gru to escort them around, which we all know brings a warranted 7 percent tax of the select candies of my choosing.

Maybe you’re one of those cleaning fanatics who stress over having friends and family over for Thanksgiving or Christmas. Here’s a tip: Just wait and clean after they’re gone, when it truly needs it. Yes, I understand and don’t take that advice either; but I suppose you could start cleaning now, and the house will be ready for company in 54 or 83 days.

If you wake up on this glorious Saturday morning and your spouse has mysteriously disappeared or your girlfriend/boyfriend is not answering the phone — don’t forget archery season opened Thursday, and they are presumably getting a jump start on Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner.

According to the Indiana Department of Natural Resources:

Wild turkey season: Fall archery, through Nov. 1 and Dec. 5 to Jan. 3. Fall firearm, Oct. 21 to Nov. 1 (one bird of either sex per hunter each fall)

Deer season: Archery, through Jan. 3. Firearms, Nov. 14 to 29. Muzzleloader, Dec. 5 to 20

Gray and fox squirrel: Through Jan. 31 (daily limit 5)

Pheasant: Nov. 1 to Dec. 15 (daily limit 2)

Quail: North of Interstate 74, Nov. 1 to Dec. 15 (daily limit 4); south of Interstate 74, Nov. 1 to Jan. 10 (daily limit 8)

Rabbit: Nov. 1 to Feb. 28 (daily limit 5)

Green frog and bullfrog: through April 30 (daily limit 25)

DNR fails to mention this, but mole season is all year round with no bag limit in my backyard.